Things are changing at work, and probably not for the better. Its a waiting game right now. Sitting at my desk I see lots of closed doors, private meetings between department supervisers. People walk by quickly, looking down or towards their destination, not wanting to meet anyone’s eye as they move quickly along.
As I walk around the floor delivering reports that I have coded I see people huddled around one person’s desk or another’s, whispering amongst themselves as their eyes dart up at me, marking my movement. I am neither a suprvisor nor a lead, and therefore deemed not a concern, and they tighten their huddle and continue with their whispering.
Tense. That is the only word to describe the general feeling on my floor.
I am curious as to what is happening. I have been told some information in confidence but I’m sure there is much more I’m not being told, and that’s fine. I’m not worried, though, for fortunately I’m excellent at my job.
I’m not trying to boast, but it’s true. I’m not saying I’m smarter than any of the other coders, or better. I work with a group of people and we all have our talents. I am better than some in one area while others are better than me in other areas. Fortunately I’m specialized, and there is only one other person in my department that can do my job, while I can do everone’s job.
So, I’m not worried. Worse case scenario I lose my job and move back to Bakersfield to live with my parents and go back to work at Taco Bell. I always said it was my favorite job. I would have to make sure I do everything I can to stay out here, though, because Baby Girl needs her Daddy and her brothers.
Change isn’t always a bad thing. It makes you re-evaluate your surroundings, see what works and what doesn’t. I’ll be searching for another job to see if there is something better for me out there, or if where I am is the best place for me right now.
Change doesn’t scare me, generally. I like the challenge of change, to see how well I can adapt to the new situation. It keeps me on my toes, less complacent, less lazy. Though if I find a new job, I will miss seeing my coworkers everyday, but I would leave knowing that I have developed friendships with some of them that will last, and strangely, may become stronger if there comes a time when we don’t work together.
Unfortunately, I don’t cope well with change when it effects my heart. I think you all know that by now.
So we’ll see what happens. I do believe that it may take a few more months to see what changes and how it effects me, my department, and my company. I’ll let you know as soon as I do, though. 🙂